Welcome to my sixth fanfiction review. I am going to be reviewing NightcoreHunter's story "The Unseen Vileblood". Overall, this story is really good. There is only one downside to the story, and, in all fairness, it is aa pretty major downside: the organization is horrible. That is going to keep the story from having a perfect score, but I won't go too hard on it. Let's get started. 

This is the story that I have the least to say about. 

Chapter 1 

Very solid chapter. It's cool how Pale let's the reader use their own character when telling the story, but that was not a good decision. That takes so much away from the story since it is not as descriptive. That can easily be forgiven, but it is enough to take away a few points. Putting that aside, the chapter is very descriptive. It's great, and I don't have much to say about it. 

Chapter 2 

This chapter has alot of run-on sentences. I don't blame Pale for that, but I had to point it out. This chapter is really good, and it makes me wonder why it took me so long to read it. Good chapter. 

Chapter 3 

This chapter is an excellent depiction of the Cainhurst Massacre. It is very descriptive, and I praise it for that. The two endings is kind of strange, but it is cool. I really don't have much else to say. Good job, Pale. 


  • Very descriptive. 
  • Well written. 
  • Two endings is very unique. 
  • Great in almost every way. 


  • Terrible organization. 
  • Run-on sentences. 
  • Lacks a main character. 


Despite the major downsides of the story, Pale did a great job in making his story stand out against other fanfictions. The shitty organization can be forgiven since Pale had to write the story on an iPad, which is not an easy thing to do. Not everybody has access to a computer, and Pale is one of those unlucky people. This story gets a 9.5/10. 

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